Understanding "La Mirada"/Do I have Something on my Face?/On a Bad Day "Why the Hell are you Staring at Me?"

"La Mirada" is something that I am still trying to get accustomed to. The word refers to Argentinians tendency to stare at you for uncomfortably long amounts of time. It happens on the streets, in the shops, in the bars, everywhere. Lately, I have been noticing that elderly people are the best(or worst depending on your perspective) at giving long, shameless, piercing looks. There have actually been a couple times on the colective when I have almost..almost asked someone if they knew me just because it would have been less awkward then standing under their gaze a minute longer. Also it must be addressed, although the subject definitely warrants some further analysis and refelction, there are not too many dark-skinned people in Buenos, Aires. Thanks to the combination of 20 years of living as a black woman in the United States and Wesleyan AFAM department, I am already hyper-aware of how race factors into social interactions, not just here in Argentina, but back in the U.S as well. So I have been working really hard to understand "la mirada" in the context of Buenos, Aires and the different ways I am perceived here or rather how my multiple identities might make "la mirada" feel a whole lot different than intended(or maybe I feel it just as its intended, who know?). This fact confuses me in my daily attempts to decipher what different stares mean. I have begun to try and categorize the stares based on some observations.

1.Standard mirada- standing in line at Farmacity, making your selection at the maxikiosko, window shopping, looking at a menu in a restaurant etc. these are situations in which the standard mirada is most commonly experienced. It often involves the person turning to look at you...nothing too crazy, but it just lasts about 30 sec longer than I am accustomed to. It pretty much feels like the person just forgot to stop looking, like they might have zoned out for a min...but nope they are focused on YOU. Look out for middle-aged women, elderly men and women, business-men, shop workers, these are the people who are most commonly seen giving the standard mirada.

2."I Have X-RAY Vision" Mirada-This type of stare is the favorite and specialty of almost all Argentinian men regardless of age, title, or occupation. This stare is often preceeded or followed closely by one of the following: An air kiss, a smile, a comment "ohh que hermosa", or even in some circumstances if he's in the middle of eating something, the licking of the fingers(by far my least favorite). I have noticed that young boys age 12-15ish have just begun to develop their catcalling/staring skills. The are often a bit shyer, if you are walking on the street they might simply nudge their friend as they stare, or whisper something quietly when you're just a little to far to be able to hear it. Also, by far my craziest mirada of the week. A middle-aged man with a Baby Bjorn attached to his front side and a small infant inside, hand in hand with a woman who appeared to be his partner, slows, turns, smile and wink combo, and a good ole' "hola." What do I do with that?

3.Mirada/"I'm thinking about Mugging you"-This is the stare I wish I could decipher better, although at times it is hard to figure out if its simply the harmless, undressing you with my mind" or something far scarier. At this point in time, I'm feeling quite defensive at all times, like my karate fists are poised at all times, finger on the trigger of my pepper spray at night, just READY for anything and this ninja-like alertness makes me suspicious of everyone. But I have been trying to use some other context clues. Beware of the mirada from, drunks, young men walking alone late at night without headphones, unkempt looking children, people lingering when entering and exiting the subte. Still trying to figure this one out, for now, I apologize if I give you a dirty look/cross the street/run(has happened) from a harmless mirada, but I would rather be rude than sorry!